Saturday, June 14, 2014

Rumblings: Where's Dan Dan?

 1. Yo Joe Smo'lis where is the Mayor?? Mayor Dannel Drew missed Middletown's Memorial Day parade & Veteran dedication ceremonies at the Westfield parade and at the State Veteran's Memorial. Councilman Bob "Zippy" Santangelo took his place, and when pressed told various individuals the mayor was "out of town."
No offense, but as the elected chief of chiefs of sorts of our fair City, wouldn't this be one of THE most important ANNUAL events you as mayor should attend? I mean, won't the Jersey shore or whatever beach your vaca'ing on be there any other weekend?? Or is it fundraising with Big D down in Stamford that's got you worn for wear?  Besides, Lil' Dan you make $90K+ a year &set your own schedule- basically you can take a 3 day weekend any time you want. As we wait for the spin of where the Prince of Middletown was- which you can bet will be an Oscar winning performance - family illness, funeral, secret debriefing at the White House, Jolie-Pitt-esque international adoption, or better still a second trip abroad to say China on our behalves, Less(er) we forget who we are dealing with - even the Middletown Republican's got it together this year actually have more than just a dirty dozen to march in the parade for pete's sake Dan Dan!

2. Lesser than the Status Quo Matt Lesser gets his first job! Well, not really. Its as CEO of a liberal "wink wink" non partisan non profit, which means schmoozing, shaking hands, & twitter with no real work. Right up Matt's alley.

3.  The Artful Dodger: ML is on the board of Oddfellow's Playhouse. And word on the street is that with so many viable non profits vying for Middletown grant money there isn't enough to go around to the usual suspects anymore. Certain regular (liberal & entitled) players  are up in arms that they have to now actually apply & make a good case to the Middletown Art's Commission and compete with new non profits on the block for what used to be a rubber stamped deal. Ironically, it has been Democratic Mayor Drew who has cut the Art's budget two cycles now, unlike a former Republican Mayor who actually increased it...Rumor has it that the playhouse is on the skids & no one who hasn't already jumped ship is getting paid. We think that's enough to get Dic Wheeler's (juggling) balls in a twist. 

4. Past, Present, &Yet to Come: A total of three Middletown Police Officers have been "coincidentally" let go since the investigation into whether or not allegations of  Chief McKenna  poppin' pills got underway. What did these three officers have in common?  Don't forget Mayor Most Drewivious came out in full support of the chief's innocence. No coincidence the media has made no mention of this ongoing investigation since January! Why didn't the chief take a drug test right then and there? Well, we predict things could get hairy before this issue comes to a close.

5. Fire & Ice: Robert Kronenberger was appointed by the mayor and made Fire Chief of the Middletown Fire Department last week in a 10-2 vote. Who were the hold outs? Councilmembers Serra and Russo-Driska. And which voted against Kronenberger because he allegedly looked at said councilperson's relative the wrong way? Now that's cold.

6. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times ... and now times are just HOPEless. This councilmember asked for a property tax break after the recent reevaluation because of his or her home is haunted. Not allegedly haunted, but according to him or her, certifiably haunted. So did the Assessment Board of Appeals grant this break? You betcha freakin-looney tuney!

7. Make the Connection. Which non profit was unhappy with its re-val price and its loss in tax exempt status? Go ask your buds in the Blue House for help.

8. Charter Chatter: If you were playing along at home, name the former Councilman on the Charter Revision Committee who asked for a copy of the Charter at the committee's first meeting? Clue: he then made the comment at the meeting after discovering in his stack of documents at how short it was like he had never seen it before. 

9. Accountability. Transparency, its for the children, & all that feel good stuff. BOE stalls budget workshop and implementation of joint accounting software with the City. Drew says an ALLIANCE should GRANT the City and the BOE a better financial infrastructure. Something tells us some folks just don't want everyone to know where the money is...

10. An Average Joe: Rumor: Joe Samolis, the Mayor's Chief of Staff aka the Mayoral Babysitter to Middletown's Sire is to become the next Senior Services Director, Park & Rec Director, Athletic Director for the BOE or all three. This guy has taken so many for the team how can this go on much  longer? Before Drew leaves office, you can bet he will be making it so for his number one.

11. Oliver Twisted: What the Dickens?? What is going on with the City's IT Dept.? Erased hard drives ,secret monitoring programs, and supposedly the MPD is confiscating computers?  Even Alfred Jingle couldn't get the Pickwickians in a debacle as shifty as what the Drew Crew has been up to.Shhhh! Is Big Brother (Joe) listening with the help of the boys in blue? Please sir can we have some more? About this rumor that is. Inquiring minds need to know!

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